Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Two Sentence Tuesday: Fun Edition 2

Okay, so I'm not going to post the steampunk stuff I've posted for the past couple of weeks. I'm back to the fun story, "Lullaby." This is the story of four women, at night, with guns, about to do their job. This passage comes immediately after the last segment.
“Jogger.”

The three women joined Jamie at their strollers, pistols and silencers stowed out of sight. Instantly, they started talking about schools and teachers and principals and the high sugar content in Capri Sun beverages.

The jogger, a middle-aged man with a ring of hair around his head and enough hair on his back for a rug, entered the spotlight of the streetlamp and glanced at the four women. His huffing was ragged and wet.When he saw the women, he changed his posture and puffed out his chest a bit. The effect looked like a gorilla trying to run a marathon.
Again, slightly longer than two sentences but what the hey. Who's keeping score?

I'm still listening to The Lies of Locke Lamora so I can't isolate just two sentences. Might finish by next week so be looking for the review.

For more Two Sentence fun, Women of Mystery is the place to be today.

7 comments:

David Cranmer said...

Of course the fun line that stands out is "with a ring of hair around his head and enough hair on his back for a rug." Muy bien. (And mister you better believe I am keeping score with the lines and expecting a Locke Lamora review)

Leah J. Utas said...

Love it, especially the "puffed out his chest" bit.

Scott Parker said...

David - Thanks for the compliments. And I'm about 28 minutes from finishing part 2 of 3 of Lamora.

Leah - It's what we men do around women. Not sure I mentioned this elsewhere but when I read this little vignette to my writing group, the women liked it and some of the men didn't know what to make of it. Guess I'm channeling my inner girl. Thanks for the praise.

Clare2e said...

I think it's going swimmingly! Or furrily, or whatever...

I want the Lamora review, too : )

Charles Gramlich said...

I'm with David, liked the description of the guy.

Barbara Martin said...

Those are great lines Scott. Love a man "with...enough hair on his back for a rug".

Scott Parker said...

Clare2e - Swimmingly is such a fun word. I love it. And I'm on the downhill slide for Lamora (about 5 hours left).

Charles - Well, I just decided to describe the guy how many women see us: as gorillas.

Barbara - Thanks for the praise. Have to wonder if I shouldn't write exclusively from a female POV. My Houston detective novel has a female POV and I've been told I get the woman POV pretty well. Hmmm...